If you are a cop, were a cop, live with a cop, or are
close to a cop you will recognize a lot of the following:
FASCINATION STAGE - 1st thru 4th year of Law Enforcement.
For most officers, this is their first time outside of the middle
class bubble. They have never seen a dead body, never seen
life-threatening injuries, never dealt with a family disturbance,
never witnessed the squalor some people call "living life", and never
really understood the phrase "Man's Inhumanity To Man" until now.
Everything is new to them. You can ID them by the amount of fancy new
equipment they carry... a ten BILLION candlelight power flashlight,
"state-of-the-art" holster, pens that write in the rain, a ballistic vest
rated to stop Tomahawk missiles, and an equipment bag large enough to house
a squad of Marines.
They love it, showing up early for their shift. They work way past
the end of their shift without even considering an OT slip. They
believe rank within the department is based only on ability and those
in the upper ranks got there by knowledge and skill in police work
only. They believe the Department runs with the same attention to
detail and efficiency as Joe Friday's Dragnet TV show.... everyone is
dedicated & committed, everyone is competent, everyone is on the same page
and working towards the same high-minded goals.
When they finally go home to their spouse/ significant other, they tell them
everything they did and saw; they are wired up. Some of the
more "eaten up" purchase a police scanner at Radio Shack so they can hear
the radio calls while at home.
HOSTILITY STAGE - 4th thru 6th year
They now show up for work about 2 minutes before their shift, and they are
hiding out about 30 minutes before end of shift, writing reports so they can
just throw them in the sergeant's in-box and leave ASAP.
They have to get to their second job to earn money to pay for the
divorce that is pending.
Their spouse is no longer interested in hearing about all the gore and
heartache. They get the "you spend more time with the cops than you do with
me" speech. They now know how the lieutenant got those silver bars on his
collar.
They consider the FOP, the city, and all brass to be as dangerous as any
viper. They gripe about everything, drink excessively, chase women, and hate
the public, politicians, media, etc. They feel they have more in common with
the hookers, thieves, dopers, etc.. but hate them too.
Those pens that write in the rain are no longer needed. Writing
traffic citations can be a lot more trouble than they are worth, even
on a nice day To write one, or to write anything while standing in
the rain, is a sure sign of an insane person.
SUPERIORITY STAGE - 7th thru 15th years
This is when cops are at their best.
They have survived changes in administration. They know how the political
game is played, both inside and outside of the department. They know
who they can trust and who they can't. They have select friends within the
department, and stay away, as best they can, from the nuts and boot-lickers.
They know the legal system, the judges, prosecutors, defense attorneys, etc.
They know how to testify and put a good case together.
They are usually the ones that the brass turn to when there is some
clandestine request or sensitive operation that needs to be done
right.
These cops are still physically fit and can handle themselves on the street.
They will stay around the station when needed, but have other
commitments; such as a second job, a second spouse, a second
boyfriend/girlfriend (sometimes both), etc. They have most of their
friends outside of Law Enforcement now.
ACCEPTANCE STAGE - 15th to ????
Now the cops have a single objective... retirement and pension
Nothing is going to come between them and their monthly check
The boss, the city (or State, or county), the idiots around the
station, and the creeps on the street can all go to hell... because
they could come between them and "sitting on the beach".
There is no topic of discussion that can't somehow lead back to
retirement issues.
These guys are usually sergeants, detectives, crime scene technicians,
station duty, or some other post where they will not be endangered.
They especially don't want some young stupid cop getting them sued, fired,
killed, or anything else causing them to lose their "beach time".
These guys are usually hard to find when the "clusters" hit.
They spend a lot of time having coffee, hanging around the station,
and looking at brochures of things they want to do in retirement.
Then the retired cop usually dies within the first five years of
retirement, saving the city (or State, or county) a bunch of money.
COPS You wonder why he pulled you over and gave you a ticket for speeding...
•
He just worked an accident where people died because they were going too fast...
•
You wonder why that cop was so mean...
•
He just got done working a case where a drunk driver killed a kid...
•
You work for 8 hours...He works for up to 18 hours...
•
You drink hot coffee to stay awake...
•
The cold rain in the middle of the night keeps him awake...
•
You complain of a "headache", and call in sick...
•
He goes into work still hurt and sore from the guy he had to fight the night before...
•
You drink your coffee on your way to the mall...
•
He spills his as he runs code to a traffic crash with kids trapped inside...
•
You make sure your cell phone is in your pocket before you leave the house...
•
He makes sure his gun is clean and fully loaded and his vest is tight...
•
You talk trash about your "buddies" that aren't with you...
•
He watches his buddy get shot in front of him...
•
You walk down the beach, staring at all the pretty girls...
•
He walks down the highway looking for body parts from a traffic crash...
•
You complain about how hot it is...
•
He wears fifty pounds of gear and a bullet proof vest in the middle of July and still runs around chasing crack heads...
•
You go out to lunch, and complain because the restaurant got your order wrong...
•
He runs out before he gets his food to respond to an armed robbery...
•
You get out of bed in the morning and take your time getting ready...
•
He gets called out of bed at 2 am after working 12 hours and has to be into work ASAP for a traffic homicide...
•
You go to the mall and get your hair redone...
•
He holds the hair of some college girl while she's puking in the back of his patrol car...
•
You're angry because your class ran 5 minutes over...
•
His shift ended 4 hours ago and there's no end in sight...
•
You call your girlfriend and set a date for tonight...
•
He can't make any plans because even on his off days he still gets called back into work...
•
You yell and scream at the squad car that just passed you because they slowed you down....
•
He's in the driver seat of the squad car, going to cut somebody out of their car only to find out that they're dead when he gets there and it's too late...
•
You roll your eyes when a baby cries in public...
•
He picks up a dead child in his arms and wishes that it was crying...
•
You criticize your police dept and say they're never there quick enough...
•
He blasts the siren while the person in front of him refuses to move over because they're talking on their cell phone and doing their makeup...
•
You hear the jokes about fallen officers and say they should have known better...
•
He runs into situations when everyone else is running away in order to make sure no one else gets hurt and loses his life doing it…
•
You are asked to go to the store by your parents. You don't...
•
He would take a bullet for his buddy without question...
You sit there and judge him, saying that it’s a waste of money to have them around...
Yet as soon as you need help he is there...
